The girl who looked like a grilled chicken



I looked almost like this after
being in the sun for too long

 Okay, so I've been absent from the blogosphere for a couple of days. Nothing weird happened, no third eye appeared on my forehead, no horns grew on my head and luckily I don't look like the Yeti! However, this silly random girl who's typing right now, wanted to get tanned... And ended up looking like a grilled chicken!             =( Actually, like an over-grilled chicken... So I had to be in bed and put on every single after sun I could find; also, while looking like a fresh tomato, I had to deal with people telling me to try every home-made remedy they could possible think about.

Now that I get to think about it, because for the last couple of days I felt like a tomato ready to become ketchup and my neurons were mushier than usual, I wonder why people say stupid things without caring about what the person they're talking to might think.

Yeah, this is my alter-ego!

I really hate people who say things just because they feel like talking. I think every day when they wake up they surely set a limit of words to be spoken that day, and they feel the need to fulfil that task so they don't give a shit for the stupid comments or remarks they might say. For example, I'm extremely white, right? Actually, according to one of my friends, I'm Casper-like white. So the other day, when some people saw me in my bikini said stupid things like "Wow! You're transparent!" "Are you feeling okay?, you look really pale" "My God! Look at your legs! They're totally white! It's creepy, you know?" "Why are you so white, E?". All those shitty comments made me want to smack the hell down out of those mother-fuckers and say: I'm white, so what? What's the big issue? Who looks like a grilled chicken after trying to get tanned, me or you? What's your fucking problem, then? 

Another thing that freaks me out is people who gives you all kinds of home-made remedies. I mean, it's not that I have anything against them, they are really helpful sometimes and I'd really appreciate it if any of you ever recommend one to me; but what I hate is people who sees you and gives you 5 different things you can drink or do to feel better. The other day, one of my friends came to see me and the conversation we had was something like this:

Friend: Oh, my God! Look at your skin! You're as red as a tomato!
Me: (thinking: of course, idiot, I'm sunburnt!) Yeah, I know...
Friend: You should put some Aloe Vera Lotion on it... You know what? My mom has this home-made thing: you have to take an old handkerchief and soak it into very cold milk and then put it on your skin. Or, you can boil some water and add oil, and whisk it until it's colder and it becomes some kind of jello, and then you put it on your skin. Oh, and there's another one! My granny used to put some tomato slices on my skin when I was sunburnt... Another option is...

And she continued ranting non-stop for 20 more minutes about home-made remedies and I ended up believing I was about to become a new kind of salad if I followed her advice.

Do you see why it was
such an insult to be
compared with her?

However, the worst thing handle is those people who tell you things like: "You really look like shit! Your face is all swollen...You look like Heather Locklear without make up!" or "Ugh, you have a blister on your lip... That's disgusting! Ugh, I can't look at you", oh! and there's another one even worse: "You definitely look like a leper with all that skin coming out of your face. Yuck!"

Well, there are two good things that I have to highlight after this "steamy" experience: 1- the other day, when I was feeling like crap and looked like a grilled chicken, Leo looked at me and said "You are all burnt and still look as beautiful as ever. You rock, hun!"...yep, that's my lovely man!; and 2- I look like Oprah (well, not that much... I'm extra white, remember?), but skinnier and with green eyes!

Yeah, I definitely rock!